HOW TO…

 

*avoid sounding like an ignorant idiot when it comes to THE SHUTDOWN. Simple, listen to Miley:

 

*live past 103…sleep on your back and eat a civilized dinner of grilled fish and veggies.

*FaceTime sans 6 chins…don’t download the iPhone iOS7 software.

  • Did you know that after the intro of FaceTime in 2010, the number of chin implants increased 71% from 2010-2011. Cluck cluck cluck!

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*pronounce Haim. It rhymes with lime. And look like the sisters (view the below pic).

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*nail an interview, leave your date desperate to see you again, and boost your  social skills. Read literary fiction…specifically something by Chekhov or Alice  Munro. Why?

  • “Literary fiction often leaves more to the imagination, encouraging readers to make inferences about characters and be sensitive to emotional nuance and complexity.” – Pam Belluck

*get eye make-up off your face when you’re stuck remover-less and looking like  the victim of a fight…rub it off with Aquaphor (or Vaseline)!

*get the sauciest workout. Foam roll beforeeee you get yo sweat on.

*feel a little more sexy-armed before going out in a sleeveless getup. 10 quick  little push-ups ‘ll do the trick.

*twerk. Thanks, RiRi…you go gurl.

 

*zen. Breathe, baby. Count your inhale and then exhale for the same amount of  time. Start with 10 breaths and build from there.

 

As Gilda Radner once said: “Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity.”

xoxo

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Freakin’ Weekend Frieda

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